Being Slam-less
June 9th, 2008, 6:44 pm · 4 Comments · posted by Hana
I was on my vacation last week and man, it was so good. I needed to take myself off the Internet and spend some time with my family. I celebrated my birthday and my fifth wedding anniversary. My husband and I went camping in a place that was completely isolated from civilization. No running water, no electricity, nothing. We camped in a tent, brought our own water, dug holes, built a campfire, cooked our meals over the fire, and went to bed under the starry sky.
When we got home, I got busy cleaning up and sorting things from our camping trip. Halfway through the bustle of moving through the house, my husband rushed up to me and said, “Are you mad???”
I looked stunned at him and said no.
“You’re shaking the house with your violent opening/closing of the doors. I thought you were mad about something. I had to check with you.”
We live in a house with a raised floor, and yes, I had been opening/closing doors multiple times. The master bedroom door, bathroom door, office door, the house doors, and cabinets. I was totally unaware that I was slamming doors because I was so focused on what I was doing. Clean, put away, check, clean, put away, check, repeat and lather…
I apologized and sat down for a few minutes to calm down. I began moving a little slower, less of a whirlwind through the house. I wondered about having the doors somehow “catch” themselves so they didn’t swing so freely into the frame. Like some businesses have doors slow down immediately before they touch the frame. I would like to have my home installed with those type of doors that help reduce unintentional slamming.
This type of happening is a pretty common problem among “mixed” marriages/relationships where a deaf person is living with a hearing person. The hearing person has to somehow live with a deaf person who is unaware of how much noise they are making. It’s a true test when both work together to reach a understanding without offending the other. I’m just glad that he talked with me about it without getting angry about “slamming the d**** doors!”
Not only do I want to preserve the peace, I would like to avoid damage to the door frames so it’s a win-win if I can avoid slamming doors.
I’m trying to be slam-less. 
How about you?
Got a question? Something you want to bring to my attention? 
June 10th, 2008 at 6:35 am
Sigh. Having grown up and lived with hearing relatives nearly all my life, I have become aware of the noise I make and habitually close doors gently, pad about quietly on sock feet, and put down instead of dropping items. Yet my parents complained about the noise I made reading late at night even when it is just shifting in bed and turning pages. Or my daughters complain about the noise of putting away dishes late at night or going to the bathroom and running water. Can’t win–there must be a useful purpose to earplugs.
June 10th, 2008 at 7:13 am
My husband (hearing) is a very noisy person (very annoying to some hearing people), and he’s happy to have someone that is just as noisy as him
June 10th, 2008 at 9:09 am
I agree! I live with two deaf parents and sleeping in on a saturday morning is merely impossible with my mom wanting to cook breakfast. She would go around looking for things to cook and slamming cabinets and also banging pits and pans together looking for the right one. Whew! I’m slowly getting used to it. I’m also in a mixed relationship. And that to has shown that it can be difficult. But he puts up with me and I can do the same.:) Great blog!
June 10th, 2008 at 10:14 am
To Dianrez - Yes, there have been some times when I yelled at my husband and told him to put in some earplugs on occasion when he complains a bit too much.
To Rox - You are so lucky!!!