I went to this local bar between my home and UCLA campus to watch Game 2 of the World Series. I was comfortably perched at the bar enjoying a drink. Next to me, a gentleman gets my attention and tries to gesture something. After several failures, we agree to get a pen and paper. To my delight. Most people aren’t willing to go this far. This gentleman writes a question: “Is the pitcher also a batter?”
Luckily for me, I had a refresher from JJ Puorro who came over to watch Game 1 at my place the night before. He explained to me how it was different for the National and American leagues in Major League Baseball.
Proudly knowing the answer, I write back “They do when they’re in Colorado”. He nodded and replied, “American - National League”. I nodded back.
We write back and forth a bit. I learn that the gentleman is from England. When things get a bit quiet on the pen and paper, I ponder to myself, “Most americans wouldn’t have went that far to ask a deaf person such a specific question.”
Don’t get me wrong. I’m the last person to discriminate. I’m deaf and am discriminated against almost daily. But doesn’t it seem the foreigners are more accepting of deaf people, instead of doubting and judging us? The pattern has definitely appeared again and again for me.
He and I get to talking about Bush and who will win the next election. The conversation leads to global warming. I ask him, “Can we do enough to reverse global warming?”. He replies, “No. We will have to adapt. The politicians will not move fast enough.” I answer, “Best wisdom I’ve heard in years.”
“Because the weather in USA is more extreme, you’ll be the first to see it.”
“Stay in England where it’s SAFE :)”
He buys me a beer. The Red Sox wins. This is a good night… because I wasn’t judged.
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Posted on October 25th, 2007 by tayler
October 25th, 2007 9:17 pm
I liked this post. I agree. People from other countries seem more willing to make communication happen than in our home land.
~ LaRonda
October 25th, 2007 9:24 pm
Perhaps it’s because of the multilingual/multicultural aspect of European travel? Europe is so much smaller, and people vacation in other countries (tons of Brits go to Spain on holiday) that maybe he’s more adaptable to alternate forms of communication?
Or maybe he’s just genuinely a nice guy. Either way, glad you had a nice chat.
October 25th, 2007 9:37 pm
Excellent post! Yes, this is true about most people from other countries. I had some interesting stories when I traveled to England, Spain, France, etc. I ran into some wonderful people who actually have more patient than you can ever imagine.
It is impossible to find many people in this country like that. One time I was sitting on bench waiting for city bus to come. A guy dressed in police officer (in Madrid) came and started talking to me in spanish (or in english I can’t tell). I pointed to my ear saying I can’t hear. Without any hesitation, he pulled out pad and pen to start writing. I’m like oh no, I hope he don’t write anything in spanish cuz I don’t know nothing!
He gave me the note (whew, it’s in english!) asking if I had a good day. Next thing, I know we chatted going back and forth for 15 minutes at least before the bus came.
The whole conversation was basically asking where we are from, where did we born, etc. Will we ever see that in America from police officers out of nowhere? HA!
It was interesting day for me.
Ah… Red Sox won.
-SG
October 25th, 2007 9:40 pm
Generally, hearing people in England are more discriminatory against Deaf people in general. (Things are incredibly backwards in England RE: Deaf community.) You just happened to run into a good guy. Gotta love it when that happens.
Best,
Erick
October 25th, 2007 9:41 pm
Hi– I find this to be so true. I work in a library where I estimate maybe 70% of our patrons speak english as a second langauge. Many don’t speak it at all. I can’t understand them, but my job is mostly visual anyway because I work with computers. However, they do sometimes have questions. I don’t want to make them feel bad about their language skills when they’re practicing so I always tell them I don’t hear very well. While Americans have been rude to me occasionally about the fact I can’t hear, this has NEVER happened with someone who speaks with an accent. Almost always they nod and smile. I talked to my boss about this once and she said it’s because I have this “We’ll get through this together attitude when I let them know the problem isn’t their English.” They are willing to write, draw diagrams, whatever it takes. It’s wonderful! There’s a library real close to my home, but I would never want to switch because I love working where I’m at due to all the foreigners.
October 25th, 2007 9:55 pm
wow, that sounds nice! It’s nice to meet up with friendly dudes by chance. When there were pauses in writing notes back and forth, did you get the feeling that would be the last note? I don’t really lead in writing notes that much, but then again, maybe it’s because you guys are guys.
October 25th, 2007 10:54 pm
When you left, was he still writing notes (to other hearies)? Ha ha… just thinking of that deaf joke.
October 26th, 2007 3:52 am
I think it is probably related to multi-cultural exposure, than country of origin. I grew up in a bused racially integrated elementary school (meaning people where bused in from other parts of thecity) (also, an “orthopedic school”, adapted for wheelchairs, et al), normally “integrated” high school, spent time in Africa, and Mexico on mission trips. I think these things tend to leave me more open and accepting.
Learning Spanish, French, and now ASL, tends to help to. I imagine that it is hard to gain understanding without exposure.
October 26th, 2007 7:29 am
i agree with you but not entirely. not all foreginers are being nice. i have a rude French co-worker but have a cool japanese co-worker. a good number of forgeiners at my work. they are generally thoughful people.
once on greyhound bus from dc to chicago, i met a vietnamese guy. we must have written a book all way from dc. cool guy. he had trouble speaking and understanding spoken english at that time. he could write english fairly well. he was happy to communicate with me. it was the best chat i ever had.
once in while, i met some cool american hearies. foreginers seem to be more tolerate toward to us deafies.
so bottom line, they are not all the same.
October 26th, 2007 11:03 am
Tayler,
Tayler,
I am glad that you like foreigners
Myself, I am fond of foreigners, however deaf or hearing. Having travelled around the world many times, I have always enjoyed communicating with Europeans all the way from The Netherlands to Greece. We would gesture a great deal on train. Cool!
The only problem I have experienced is when I am in Great Britain, Brits, however deaf or hearing, would avoid responding when my mother and I ask a question on paper.
Come to think of it, the USA is so isloated from the world, Americans are so monolingual. The same can be said about Great Britain that is isolated from Europe.
October 26th, 2007 6:30 pm
I think that’s great. I have met many foreigners myself who shares the same feeling of frustration when they are in the US of A. Perhaps they do understand our feelings of rejection or being different?
What if we met foreigners in their comfort zone… would they be as nice? But I’m glad you both had a good talk. Maybe because of you, he has a newfound or better respect for a deaf person next time he bumps into one.
October 26th, 2007 7:37 pm
Comments:
-Agree that foreigners are far more accomodating.
-Glad I could help with baseball…wait til’ we talk about football.
October 27th, 2007 11:35 am
thanks for sharing your experience , tayler. it is always refreshing to meet a person with an open heart and mind… deaf or hearing, american or foreign. maybe when we are abroad (and we are the ‘foreigners” ) we are also more willing to go outside the boundaries of our normal everyday lives in order to make contact with a new person.
October 27th, 2007 4:19 pm
Yes, foreigners tend to be more receptive to deaf people. They are used to meet many people of different cultures so they aren’t inhibited by our differences.