Deaf Anthology: Deaf Anthology #11: "Nutmeg County Fair"

Joan: "Jill, Jill, Mom here, come, come...." (ompetition is tough, the only way to win this thing is to do the unthinkable, that got Jill's attention with her favorite object, no, not a teddy bear, so she decided to exposed her breast, and immediately Jill crawl to her over the finish line to win the race, winning the $5,000 prize and a year supply of diapers. She did still be ahead if arrested to pay a $65 fine for disorderly conduct from indecent exposure. Fortunately, no security officers were around at the time of the incident)
Jeffrey: "Mom got big......"
Jason: "Shut up, Jeffrey, now I understand why Dad read Playboy"
Official: " Congratulations to the Johnson family, a Brink will deliver the diapers, and here's the check in the amount of $5,000."John: "We're going to Disney World" (Holding up the check, meanwhile at the diary exhibit, Jason is milking a cow, squirting milk at Jill)

Jason: "Let's go on the Ferris Wheel!"
Jeffrey: "You so good at milking a cow, you had a lot of practice masturbating yourself every night under the sheets every night."
Jason: " Shut up, Jeffrey" (John, Jessica, and Jill goes through the exhibition hall while the boys run the maze in the field, they volunteer a hour at the Deaf Awareness Booth)
Joan: "The Jones still gossips, especially about you losing $200 at poker the other night.

John: "Really, I'm going to strangled them later." (John collects free gifts by applying for various credit cards)

Joan: "I got to go to the Canjun cooking demonstration now." (Jason and Jeffrey went into the forbidden area, saw some fuses and lighted them with the cigarette lighter, setting off a string of explosives, skyrockets blast off into the skies, a premature display of fireworks in broad daylight)
Officer Bob: "Are these your boys"
Joan: "Don't tell me that they set off fireworks prematurely, and how's the Deacon?"
Jeffrey: "Jason told me, blame him, not me."

Officer Bob: "Since these terrorists are too young to be at Gitzmo, I'll keep them busy the rest of the afternoon at the circus." (the boys were assigned to manure clean-up duty with the elephants, however they have fun in scrubbing them down them down in the lake)

John: "Boys, let's head over to the Children's Stage." (Deaf magician Mathew Morgan from Indianapolis appears on stage with his Russian dancer wife, Smokey and Woodsy cancelled their appearances after been blown apart during the premature fireworks explosion. Smokey's ranger hat was found on Interstate 95, so much for fire safety)
Magic Morgan: "Would you boys volunteer to be my assistant during the show"
Jason and Jeffrey: "Anything is better than manure duty."
Magic Morgan: "Help me set up the stage" (Jason and Jeffrey got their parents permission to be assist, hoping that he'll reveal a few secrets. While they set up, one problem, the rabbit disappeared, apparently escaped)
Jeffrey: "No problem, I found a substitute for the rabbit" (during the show, Magic Morgan, selects Charlie from the audience, and shown him the empty Hat and uses his wane to tap it, and asked Charlie to pull out the rabbit....but instead the skunk was pulled out and Harry got sprayed)

Jason: "No, Jeffrey, you didn't"
Jeffrey: "He wasn't smelly when I found him"
Magic Morgan: "Despite what happened, I will never forget this day for the rest of my life, you both still get your Magician Assistant Certificates, an autographed photograph. Thank you and I'll release the skunk back to the wild."
Joan: "What have you boys done this time?"
Jason: "Mom, do you have to repeat that same question over and over again for the rest of our children, we are of the age of innocence."
John: "I'll stop to pick up several cans of tomato juice." (everyone got into the Matrix with the windows rolled down)

Joan: "Here are the towels, I want you to scrub each other down and don't come out until you all smell fresh and clean."
Jason: "Your arms up while I scrub your armpits."
Jeffrey: "Don't tickle me"

Jeffrey: "We think it's great to bath in V-8 vegetable juice, like having our own spa!" (Joan put milk on table, box of Fig Newtons, Bandit stole a few)

Jason: "...as long it's not the 10W40 engine oil that were used in V-8."

Revised (1/09/08)