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TILL DEAF DO US PART: Life In A Mixed Marriage
 The DEAFinite Resource Online Webster defines “marriage” as “the state of being united to a person of the opposite sex as husband or wife in a consensual and contractual relationship recognized by law.” For the word “contract,” they define it as a “binding agreement.” Also listed as a definition for “contract” is “an order or arrangement for a hired assassin to kill another p...Sun, Feb 05 2012 INDIANA’S HB 1367 – Send Your Letter of Opposition Now!!!
The DEAFinite Resource Online If you keep up with the political happenings around the country, especially those points that will affect the Deaf and Hard of Hearing population, you might already know about Indiana’s House Bill #1367. If you are not familiar with this, you can read it at: [link] The main point of this bill is to remove the current outreach center at the Indiana School of the De...Wed, Feb 01 2012 "I'D HATE BEING DEAF -- I LOOK TERRIBLE IN BLACK"
The DEAFinite Resource Online If you’ve read my blog, you may remember that I (and probably most deaf people) have people telling me the strangest things and asking me some of the most bizarre questions I ever thought I would be asked. Sometimes they're annoying, many times they just crack me up, but they always leave an impression on my mind. I was sitting in a local Applebee’s, studying the ...Wed, Jan 11 2012 "HO! HO! HUH?" TURNING A LIMP HAND TO A FELLOW DEAFIE
The DEAFinite Resource Online Every year around this time, I begin to worry. I worry that we won’t have the money or capabilities to afford gifts for our children. I worry about that a lot. My husband tells me over and over that gifts are not what Christmas is about. He’s right. Yet still I worry. I’m sure even to the point of selfishness. And every year, God proves to me that He is in charg...Fri, Dec 23 2011 A DEAF PERSON'S GUIDE TO THE HOLIDAYS.....again
The DEAFinite Resource Online Since many people are new to my blog, here is my GUIDE for you that I posted last December. All others, read again. It's here for you, too! A DEAF PERSON'S GUIDE TO HOLIDAYS WITH NON-SIGNING FAMILY It’s Christmas time and, chances are, you’re going to be spending some of that time around family and friends. Perhaps you’re Deaf or hard of hearing and y...Mon, Dec 05 2011 WHAT? WHAT? WHAT DID I MISS?
The DEAFinite Resource Online When a person is born without or loses one of his five senses, the focus by many is on the loss and how, after the fact, that poor person misses or loses so much. Whether it be losing your sense of taste and not being able to enjoy chocolate anymore (yum), losing your sense of touch and not being able to decipher if something is too hot to hold at the moment (ouch), o...Fri, Nov 18 2011 I AM DEAF AND THAT'S OK!
The DEAFinite Resource Online Last week, I attended a deaf convention. It was for an organization that claims to focus on people with adult-onset hearing loss (late-deafened adults, LDAs). I attended a few of their other conventions in the past, but it’s been five years since the last one. I wasn’t sure how it would go. I had talked with LDAs and had always felt like the bulk of them spend 99%...Wed, Nov 02 2011 WHAT THE F*** DO YOU KNOW?!?!?: Should ASL Profanity Be...
The DEAFinite Resource Online I recently went online and decided to look up any new Deaf- and ASL-related books available on Amazon. One of them caught my eye. It was a book on the “dirty words” in Sign Language. It made me consider whether it was appropriate to teach the profanity of ASL to new students or not. I’ve heard the debate. When James Woodward came out with his two books, “Sign...Fri, Oct 21 2011 YES YOU CAN!
The DEAFinite Resource Online As a teacher of ASL, I've been told many reasons (or excuses) for why a person cannot learn to sign. Sure, there's the usual, "no time," or, "too old," both of which is a matter of opinion, but very often people will tell me they can't learn to sign because of a disability they deal with on a daily basis. I don't buy it though. Yes, there are definitely exceptions to...Sun, Oct 09 2011 IT IS WHAT IT IS...AND I LIKE THAT
The DEAFinite Resource Online The other night, I was laying bed, watching the auditions for the new show, “The X Factor,” when something hit me. It was my teenaged daughter, Mollie, trying to get my attention with a sock. Apparently, I was so engrossed in the show that I didn’t notice her standing in the corner, jumping up and down and waving her arms. She’d been doing this for the past fi...Sat, Oct 01 2011 DON'T CALL ME THAT! Are Some People Too Sensitive In Regard...
The DEAFinite Resource Online People have their opinions. Anyone who reads my (or anyone’s) blog will clearly know that. Opinions exist about everything from the President of the United States to the price of gas to whether Kim Kardashian’s boobs look real. OK. I actually don’t have an opinion on that one. One thing that’s been discussed in many different ways is what terms are acceptable ...Sun, Sep 25 2011 UH-HUH. OH-I-SEE. SURE.
The DEAFinite Resource Online There is a certain give and take in the Deaf community regarding how the deaf work with the interpreters. One of the ways that a Deaf signer can acknowledge that he or she understands what was just said is the old-fashioned head nod. This doesn’t just take place with interpreters, but whenever conversing in sign. It’s kind of like the equivalent of the “Uh...Wed, Aug 17 2011 GILBERT GRAPE'S MOTHER HAS NOTHING ON ME
The DEAFinite Resource Online One of my very favorite movies is the Johnny Depp film, “What’s Eating Gilbert Grape?” If you’ve never seen it, shame on you. Now, go out and rent it immediately. In the movie, Gilbert’s (Depp’s) mother weighs on the upside of 500+ lbs. She doesn’t really ever leave the living room and, in fact, hadn’t left the house in years. The husband is dead, so all of the kids w...Sun, Aug 14 2011 SHARING MY DEAFNESS -- "The Hazards of Working the Drive...
The DEAFinite Resource Online Checkers. She wanted Checkers for lunch. Or in some places they call it Rally’s. But what she wanted was definitely those spicy french fries slathered in warm, saucy cheese and bacon. But it’s July. I mean, man, it’s hot outside. The last thing I wanted to do was park and get out of my air conditioned car. But she said, “Please,” so sweetly. It was the least I could d...Wed, Jul 27 2011 OOPS! THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEANT!
The DEAFinite Resource Online Oh, to learn a new language! If you’re one of the millions of people who have decided to learn a foreign language, perhaps you’ll consider learning American Sign Language. As you may know, ASL is a totally foreign language from English and it takes just as much time and dedication to become fluent in ASL as any other foreign language, like, say, Japanese. As people b...Wed, Jul 20 2011 ADVICE FOR MY OFF-BALANCE COMRADES
The DEAFinite Resource Online Being born without a right ear, I grew up making sure that whomever was with me always stood on my left. It was more for the sounds I could hear, but there was an additional benefit. See, because I’m lopsided, I always tend to walk to my left. So, naturally, I would put people over there to soften my inevitable fall. This wasn’t anything unusual for me. I always prefe...Sat, Jul 09 2011 CAN ANYONE HELP THIS DEAF "MAGOO"???
The DEAFinite Resource Online Whenever I get into a grouchy mood, I always make sure I let my husband know by telling him, “I’m a Magoo.” In case you don’t know him, Mr. Magoo was a very happy-go-lucky, almost blind cartoon character from when I was growing up—and before. Although, in general, he was a pleasant guy, I always think of Magoo from when he played the part of “Scrooge.” I pretty sure h...Fri, Jul 08 2011 THE DELIMMA: Does Correcting Someone's ASL Cause Friction?
The DEAFinite Resource Online Independence Day is almost finished and I’m left with the remnants of a BBQ gone awry. Actually, since “awry” means “off from the expected course,” perhaps it doesn’t apply here. I mean, if I’m going to have hearing guests in the house, I should expect some trouble. Yet, time after time, I keep my fingers crossed (which, by the way, makes it very hard to sign) in hope...Mon, Jul 04 2011 STEREOTYPING: Do You Stereotype the Deaf and Hard of...
The DEAFinite Resource Online ster·e·o·type /Wed, Jun 22 2011 DEAF DISCO BALL -- GETTING YOUR GROOVE ON AT THE EXPENSE OF...
The DEAFinite Resource Online Imagine you’re working somewhere when a person from another country comes up to you for help—a country whose language you do not know. They can speak a few words of English, but you cannot speak their language. What would you do in order to communicate with them? Would you start making up gibberish while laughing at them? Would that be the professional or polite way t...Sun, Jun 12 2011 COCHLEAR IMPLANT? IT'S UP TO YOU
The DEAFinite Resource Online In the past, I have had numerous people ask me my take on the cochlear implant controversy. I have chosen not to comment, in general, because I don’t think my opinion is significant. And I certainly don’t want anyone to read my comment and let that influence their decision or opinion on the demon device either. That was a joke. Sort of. Anyway, I’m happy to tell you ...Sun, Apr 17 2011 FINGERSPELLING FOR THE BEGINNING SIGNER
The DEAFinite Resource Online One of the most common mistakes of new American Sign Language students is the practice of using the manual alphabet any time they do not know the sign for a word. This is not a good idea! Fingerspelling is exhausting to watch. Even more important is that it is one of the most difficult skills to learn and smooth and readable fingerspelling doesn’t usually emerge until...Thu, Apr 14 2011 AND NOW I'VE EXPERIENCED EVERYTHING
The DEAFinite Resource Online One of the things that people studying sign language need to learn about is the people who actually use the language—the Deaf Community. They even have classes just about Deaf Culture and I definitely recommend one, if you get the opportunity. Within the class, undoubtedly one thing that will pop up is attention-getting procedures. Most of you should already know thes...Tue, Mar 29 2011 HE AIN'T AS GREAT AS THEY THINK HE IS
The DEAFinite Resource Online BOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!! When I begin an American Sign Language class, I try to make sure that everyone not only learns sign language, but perhaps most importantly, also learns about the population who uses it. Deafness is something that almost always shocks hearing people when they delve into such things as Deaf Culture and Deafhood and what they mean. There are several ...Sun, Mar 20 2011 SMALL TALK -- IS IT REALLY WORTH THE EFFORT?
The DEAFinite Resource Online It happened (again) just a couple of days ago. I’d had my fill of things to deal with and I just wanted to be left alone. Unfortunately, that wasn’t possible. I had to go to my daughter’s school and help out with the popcorn. I mean, hey, it was “Popcorn Friday,” and they needed me. I only had to be there until all the popcorn sacks were filled and ready to be deliver...Mon, Mar 14 2011 ONE DEAF WOMAN'S EXPERIENCE IN A SEEMINGLY HOPELESS...
The DEAFinite Resource Online Being the wife of an airport/government employee, you would think that flying wouldn’t make me nervous. Ha! You’d be wrong. However, since we have very little money, we haven’t gone anywhere by air in the past few years, anyway. However, driving? Now, that’s a different issue altogether. There was a time, not too long ago, when driving anywhere alone was quite risky f...Thu, Feb 10 2011 AND.....CUE!
The DEAFinite Resource Online The Whitman’s were due for dinner and, knowing I would be the only deaf person here and that they don’t use sign language, I tried my best to brace myself for what was to come. As Dr. Phil would say, “This wasn’t my first rodeo.” I had my paper and pen, but, because my husband, Kenny, was going to be there, he was planning on interpreting. That was nice of him, wasn’t...Sun, Jan 30 2011 BIG D / LITTLE d -- WHAT'S IT MEAN?
The DEAFinite Resource Online One of the most commonly asked questions from students who just started learning about Deaf culture is, “Why is the word ‘deaf’ sometimes spelled with a capital ‘D’ and sometimes with a lowercase? Which is it?” Good question! Especially for people like me who put correct grammar and writing skills on a pedestal. The concept is pretty simple. The lowercase “d” is used ...Wed, Jan 26 2011 SIGNING WITH YOUR BABY -- Is It All Hype?
The DEAFinite Resource Online It seems to me that “baby sign language” (as it is often called) has been popping up everywhere I go. Being a Deaf, ASL teacher, I get asked a lot of questions about this topic. One of the most frequently asked is whether baby sign language actually works. My short answer is: Yes, it definitely works if you do it correctly. My long version would more like the followin...Thu, Jan 20 2011 TELL ME YOUR SECRETS -- A Deaf Person's Lack of Privacy
The DEAFinite Resource Online The Deaf Community is a tight-knit group in which deaf and hearing alike can get together and socialize. The hearies in this group consist of many different people, not the least of which are the interpreters in any given area. As a member of the Deaf Community, I often find myself friends with the very people who provide interpretation for my appointments, ent...Thu, Jan 06 2011 TO GO OR NOT TO GO --Does Inaccessibility Automatically...
The DEAFinite Resource Online Well, the holidays are almost over. No doubt you’ve had some interesting experiences along the way. I know I have! We traveled from Michigan to southern Illinois over Christmas, to visit my and my hubby’s families. Being the only deaf member of both families, I knew that there would be struggles at times. Because I don’t live close by and they don’t see me very often...Fri, Dec 31 2010 A DEAF PERSON'S GUIDE TO HOLIDAYS WITH NON-SIGNING FAMILY
The DEAFinite Resource Online It’s Christmas time and, chances are, you’re going to be spending some of that time around family and friends. Perhaps you’re Deaf or hard of hearing and your family is not. Perhaps those hearing relatives don’t know sign language either. What’s a deafie to do to make sure they don’t go completely berserk at this time of year? Here, I’ve put together ten holiday tips ...Fri, Dec 17 2010 INACCESSIBLE LIVE THEATRE -- EVEN WITH AN INTERPRETER!
The DEAFinite Resource Online Many of you know that, in the past I did professional theatre. Moving to Grand Rapids, MI, and losing all of my residual hearing has changed that, however, as the opportunities simply aren’t there. But that hasn’t stopped my love for watching live theatre—both musicals (which were my specialty) and straight plays. So, when I saw that a theatre close-by was showing a ...Sun, Nov 28 2010 WHAT'S IN A NAME?
The DEAFinite Resource Online As I laid in bed, just a few hours after having a total hysterectomy, two women entered my room. The interpreter had left for the evening, but I had my handy dandy notebook with me, just to the side of my bed. The duo that walked into my room consisted of an older lady (probably in her 60’s) and another woman in her mid to late 40’s. Apparently, the older woman (we’l...Tue, Nov 16 2010 CAREFUL: DEAF PEOPLE CAN YELL BACK!
The DEAFinite Resource Online This morning, I went to the gas station for a tea, like I do way too often! The cashier at the counter was not one I’d met before. He was obviously very tired. He looked at me, scratched his head, and mumbled… something. I looked at him questioningly and I motioned my finger to my ear while shaking my head—indicating that I'm Deaf. He didn’t miss a beat. He leaned a...Wed, Nov 03 2010 TO DARE TO TRUST
The DEAFinite Resource Online Yesterday, I was as prepared as I’ve ever been to present a beginner’s Deaf Culture/Sign Language workshop. I had my notes, I had my handouts and I was prepared to present the material in a witty and fascinating way. The workshop was to be presented in American Sign Language with two interpreters voicing for me. I was ready. So, I turned on my wit; I turned on my cha...Sun, Oct 24 2010 "I'M NOT ANGRY!!! REALLY, I'M NOT!!!!!"
The DEAFinite Resource Online It’s inevitable. I decide I’m going to use my voice. I start off easy, making sure that the vibrations in my throat feel even and steady. I continue to talk, starting to get involved in the conversation. After a couple of minutes, I feel at ease and begin to just speak as I normally would. I start to notice something. People begin glancing at each other in a questio...Fri, Oct 22 2010 MY ADVENTURE WITH PEPPER SPRAY
The DEAFinite Resource Online Working third shift at the hotel had its advantages. My hearing loss wasn’t really an issue, as all I really needed to do was make sure all went smoothly. But it also became very difficult to stay awake. It was boring! I had to find things to do to amuse myself. A week prior, a friend and I had been discussing a local mugging in the neighborhood. She had told me that...Thu, Oct 07 2010 MAYBE IT'S THE FANGS...........
The DEAFinite Resource Online (WARNING: Angry Deaf Woman Venting Ahead!!!) The church my family joined when we moved to Michigan had a sign language interpreter available for the services. It was nice, but I was the only Deaf member. A couple of years later, the interpreter moved, leaving me without an ability to participate in services or activities within the church. Still, my family liked...Sun, Oct 03 2010 HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO KNOW???
The DEAFinite Resource Online After suffering through a trip with me to the hunting store to shop for Kenny’s birthday, I decided to treat my kids to a healthy lunch at Checker’s, a fast food joint. I was exhausted from the shopping trip (trying to figure out what kind of copper arrow is best through my daughter’s…uh…”creative” interpreting, really took the energy out of me), so I decided I would ...Thu, Sep 23 2010 "YOU SMELL LIKE A DEAF SKUNK!!!"
The DEAFinite Resource Online I was dreaming of the Deaf performer, Peter Cook. We were doing an ASL comedy sketch together. At first, the audience thought it was hilarious. Well, with Peter Cook, that kind of goes without saying. But as I got deeper and deeper into the dream, the audience started to leave. This wretched scent was filling the air and even I began to gag… “Wake up,” Kenny jostled m...Mon, Sep 13 2010 "MOM'S DEAF -- LET'S PARTY!!!"
The DEAFinite Resource Online "But I was home on time, Mom! I've been in the bathroom!" Now, how was I supposed to know if he was telling the truth? No one else was in the house and he's usually pretty honest..as far as I know. So, I let it go. After all, he was home safe and sound. But how was I supposed to set the standards high when the kids have an advantage over me in that area? Fact is, on...Tue, Sep 07 2010 I'M FREE -- AND IT'S TERRIFYING!
The DEAFinite Resource Online This weekend, my family is going away to Illinois. Actually, they left last night and won't be home till Sunday afternoon. At first, this seemed like a wonderful treat! Oh, don't get me wrong, I adore my husband and kids, but I've had the kids 27/7 since school got out and I'm downright exhausted! I need a break! Like I said, they left last night. When I signed good-...Fri, Aug 13 2010 GIMME DEAF POWER!
The DEAFinite Resource Online I believe that Deaf people, not being disabled (except by hearing people who choose to make it seem that way), can have power. Deaf power! Ever since that wonderful day in 1988, when we succeeding in ensuring that the president of Gallaudet University would, indeed, be deaf, I think we’ve been taking more steps to show it. However, the other night at dinner, I got to ...Sat, Aug 07 2010 CAN I HAVE YOUR ATTENTION, PLEASE?
The DEAFinite Resource Online Standing at the shelf in the crowded bookstore I was completely engrossed in the book I held. It wasn’t until some very elderly lady performed a full body slam on me that I was shaken from my trance. My reaction at the time? Just a bewildered expression on my face. I had said nothing to her. What could I have done in that situation? If someone had been with me, I coul...Tue, Aug 03 2010 LEARNING AMERICAN SIGN LANGUAGE TAKES TIME
The DEAFinite Resource Online As an ASL teacher and as a deaf person in general, I’ve found that almost all of the people I encounter who are wanting to learn American Sign Language go into it with unrealistic expectations. They all expect to take a series of classes and then be able to venture out into the Deaf community and converse in sign with little or no effort. And this goes both ways, mean...Sat, Jul 31 2010 QUESTIONS, STUPIDITY, AND ANSWERS
The DEAFinite Resource Online Oh, the questions I’ve been asked! In the course of lifetime (which is longer than I’d like to admit), I’ve been asked some doozies. On the happenstance that you’d like to hear a few, I decided to write down the questions I’ve been asked in the past couple of weeks: How do deaf people drive? Exactly the same way hearing people do. You don’t need sound to drive. If th...Wed, Jul 28 2010 YOU SAY ORALISM ISN'T PERFECT? RIGHT ON, BROTHER!
 The DEAFinite Resource Online As defined at [link] Oralism: A philosophy of education for the deaf, opposed to manualism, that uses spoken language consisting of lipreading, speech, the process of watching mouth movements, and mastering breathing techniques. September 6 – 11, 1880, in the city of Milan, Italy, a group of 164 participants attended the 2nd International Congress on Education of t...Tue, Jul 27 2010 TAKE A PICTURE -- IT LASTS LONGER
The DEAFinite Resource Online “Mom, why is everyone staring at us,” my daughter asked me the other night, as we were eating at Cici’s Pizza. “I’m guessing they’re seeing us sign to each other and are curious,” I responded. After all, sign language is such a beautiful language, right? (groan) Day in and day out, I am inevitably approached by hearing people who claim, “Oh, I wish I knew how to s...Sun, Jul 25 2010 "SO, LIKE, WHAT CAN DEAF PEOPLE DO, ANYWAY?"
The DEAFinite Resource Online From time to time, people have asked me what kinds of jobs deaf and hard of hearing people can have. Seems many people can’t seem to fathom that a deaf person would be just as employable and beneficial to a job as a hearing person would. Is it that difficult to see that we’re just like hearing people…only without the sound? Never underestimate a person just because th...Sat, Jul 24 2010 |
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